What is it about sleep?

As luck would have it I wrote this on the first day of our soon to be ending Christmas break and was interrupted by the sweet pitter-patter of footsteps of my Ellie. I knew I had written, but forgot what I said.  As I logged in tonight to write again I reread it and I think I will publish it anyway as it somehow represents my work-in-progress state.  Cheers!

So as one of my students told me yesterday, "These past three weeks have gone so fast! I can't believe this month is already done at school." I was feeling it too.  Fast and yet so exhausting as the time was bursting with festive events and work to do. In these past seven years I have been trying to figure out the dance of being the teacher I want to be, the wife I want to be, the mama I want to be, and the me I want to be. Each year there are things that begin to find their rhythm better than the awkward way they appeared before, and then there are still those kinks trying to work themselves out.

Every morning this week as morning hours appeared I dreamed of sleeping in, and sure enough today as the horror of skunk smell woke me far too early and I worried my dog would be running in to let me know that our Christmas wish of smelling of skunk would be granted... I jumped out of bed to thankfully find him sleeping on Ellie's bed. Of course when I returned Ellie had successfully swung further into my spot like a needle on a compass. Musical beds...at some odd hour she comes to find me which tonight I am more thankful than others as she freed up hers for Onyx to escape said skunk.

Any hopes of sleeping in vanished as I was kicked in the chest a second time, and worries about the sight of the garage door left open, and there being no way I was heading out to close it from fear of skunk. So in true mama form I began a mental list of all things I must accomplish when the sun comes up further sealing the deal of no more sleep.

However, as one might view these events as disaster, a bit of me was inspired. As I attended my sister-in-law's baby shower the other night and was asked if I miss the tiny baby stage...I thought as I have before, no I don't. I loved the baby stage and loved holding my dear sweet niece that night, but I love now too. I loved maternity leave and the magic of it all. I loved snuggling my babes and waking up at odd hours to a quiet house before the busy of the day began. Finding time to write and think.

I love the journey. There is so much that is the same, the routines, yet so much that is new and keeps us guessing, wondering, inspired. This is true of seeing your tiny, tiny boy turning into a not at all tiny boy, yet one who needs your loving care and snuggles just the same. And seeing your tiny girl who wants to be not tiny like her big brother and yet wants to be her own unique self at the same time. In these past three weeks, which is a reflection of these past three months, there are traditions that I hold so dear to my heart.  As our journey is at this place in time, I am finding myself sleeping through these quiet times.