Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Mason - International Man of Skin Tight Clothing

Day Four:

In which Mason contacts headquarters, executes a training exercise, and takes naps.

While three of the bodyguards left for their underwater training, Mason and his accomplices engaged in training exercises of their own.

First, Dad contacted HQ to update them on the mission status. Mason supervised this transmission.

Next, it was to the decontamination zone to remove any bugs or biohazards.

Mason also wanted to try out the decoy disguise he had been busy perfecting. He had Dad test run this disguise with him, and, though this reporter had a tough time telling the two apart, Mason was not totally satisfied with the test and informed his bodyguard, Dad, that he would be placing him on a strict weight management program just as soon as they returned to headquarters. Dad did not argue.

Mason and Gretchen also performed amphibious training together. Check out their moves.

After lunch, followed by another nap (this is how they do things in Costa Rica, and who was Mason to argue), Mason slipped into his Navy SEAL gear and made his way to the pool. Gretchen had informed him by way of her bodyguard, Jeanne, that there were UHMs (Unidentified Howling Monkies) in the trees just outside his room. This turned out to be true, and Mason pointed them out to Mom. He assured her that they were harmless other than the occasional flying poo.

After securing the pool, Mason and Gretchen rendezvoused on the beach, and, after a brief assessment of the sunset, made their way to la tienda and finally back to the hotel.

Day four was coming to a close, and, after a briefing back at Conner’s room, the three made their way to their quarters. Tomorrow would be another challenging day, and our hero needed his cutie sleep.

…to be continued…

Monday, November 19, 2007

Mason - International Man of Mystery

Day Three

In which Mason learns that Costa Rica is more than just a fancy hotel room, and it has dogs.

Mason awoke from his first night in Costa Rica rearing to go! At 4:30 en la manana, he roused his bodyguards and they made their way down to the beach in the brisk (and by brisk, I mean hot and humid) morning air.

Mason, not one to over exert himself the first day out, was transported along the shoreline by one of his bodyguards. This both kept Mason’s feet high and dry and made it much easier to focus on pointing out the dogs along the way.

During the walk, Mason’s bodyguards took a brief moment to take a photo together. Mason was not sure if he approved of this, but they had been put through quite a bit over the last couple of days, so he agreed that they needed some distraction, and he let it slide.

Later that morning, Mason met up with his accomplices: Gretchen and Conner. It was then that the real mission could begin. They spent the day playing in the sand, frolicking in the pool, and eating exotic carbohydrates. Gretchen and Conner’s bodyguards even joined in the fun.

After a brief nap,

Mason took another walk along the beach just after sunset

along with Gretchen and Conner.

Destination: Pescado Loco. It was here that Mason and his accomplices partook in food and libations. As with all mealtime missions, Mason was focused and serious. Eating is a job, and there is no time for messing around.

Here are some other highlights from Pescado Loco.

Toward the end of the meal, Mason and Conner decided to give the locals a demonstration of some of the more useful submission holds. Mason, who could easily take Conner, was a gentleman and allowed Conner to place him in a half nelson for the appreciative crowd that had gathered.

Tired out from the day’s events, Mason ordered his bodyguard to transport him back to the hotel in order to debrief…

…after which, he was re-briefed (with a fresh diaper) and put to bed.

…to be continued…

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Mason - International Man of Mystery

Day Two

In which Mason realizes the reality of air travel.

If day one was the example of seamless travel, day two was the universe making sure that things balanced out. Mason arrived at the Dallas Fort Worth airport feeling rested, relaxed, and ready for travel.

It all began at the baggage check-in. Only a small crowd stood between Mason and the sweet release of over 130 lbs of baggage. Mason and his two bodyguards, Mom and Dad, soon realized that the sloth-like efficiency of the DFW baggage check-in was only to be rivaled by the attendants at the post office (but that is a whole other rant).

Bored by the lengthy wait, Mason decided to make a break for it only to have his escape foiled by Mom (who was looking rather robotic, don’t you think? Notice the claw-like robo hands).

With bags checked, Mason made his way through the security checkpoint and finally to the departure gate. Once at the gate, the real waiting began. There were not enough seats to accommodate our hero and his bodyguards. The attendant tried to coax Mason with a tempting offer to stay an extra night in Dallas compensated by $800 travel vouchers, free hotel, free dinner, and a free breakfast! Hummm…

Mason stuck to his plans. He had to. His peeps were expecting him so that their fun could begin. He had to push on, and it paid off. Seats were found, but there was another problem: the plane was busted! So Mason joined the mass exodus from gate 16 to gate 40!

Blah, blah, blah…Yaddah, yaddah, yaddah…

An hour and a half after the scheduled departure time, Mason boarded the plane. He took his seat and got comfortable. This included the usual customary removal of the false foot skins.

After another hour sitting on the runway for who-knows-why, the plane made its 3 hour journey to Liberia, Costa Rica.

The doors of the plane opened, and the hot, humid air wrapped around Mason and his bodyguards like a wet, wool blanket. Ahhh, paradise!

One bumpy cab ride and our hero had finally reached his destination, The Hotel Playa Hermosa, just in time for dinner.

And it was still hot!

…to be continued…

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Mason - International Man of Mystery

Day One

In which Mason begins his mission with a pleasant day of air travel, meets a relative, and sleeps in style!

The first leg of the trip went off without a hitch. After a brief check-in at SMF, our hero, Mason, mixed and mingled with the locals at Gate A 16, broke the hearts of all the single ladies, and showed off his bipedial skills with a five-step solo free-walk. As he entered the jetway, he turned back, one last time to give his fans a crisp wave.

On the plane, tethered to his special seat, Mason took a quick inventory of necessary items:


Boarding pass...check!

Once the plane was up, Mason settled in for some shuteye.

Fast forward to touchdown at Dallas International. Here, Mason enjoyed the sights and lights of the busy runway as we taxied to our gate.

Mason made his way to our hotel for the night. It was here that Mason met up with his long-lost aunt, Amber, for a nice, tender, meaty, juicy grilled cheese sandwich! MmmmMmmm!

Finally, tuckered out from his busy day of travel, Mason returned to his hotel, and, after a light dessert of spoons with ice cream, he settled into his fine, cotton sheets to mentally prepare for the next day, and believe me, he was going to need it!

…to be continued…

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Don't Blow A Gasket!

I am not sure if it is just in his genes or if it is all the broccoli he eats, but Mason has taken to "Hulking" at the dinner table.

This little game is sure to entertain, but with all that clenching, I'm afraid of what is going on below.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Concepts of Print

Mason has recently found a love for reading. He has always enjoyed a good story or two before bedtime.

Now he is taking the books into his own hands quite literally.

He is also finding his reader's voice. In my professional teacher's opinion, he reads with great expression and fluency. I am sure that you will agree.