October 1st

My response to the woman leaving Dos Coyotes on Saturday who asked with a smile, "Is it Halloween already?" :  "One day is not enough for costumes!" I grinned, spreading the joy.

Well as Mason would say, "Yesterday we said goodbye to September and today is the first day of October."  October, the bittersweet time of year.  October is filled with so much to look forward to, and filled, filled to the brim where things begin to overflow.  Today was a Monday and bittersweet is fitting.

Tonight as my mama skills were maxed out and exhaustion was setting in, my head was spinning...spinning with all to be getting done and spinning with "live in the moment: these two need you."  We took a ride to the mailbox, me on my feet following behind as they raced their bikes up the road.  There is something about this strip of road of ours that helps erase the wild and crazy of the day.  Our little ol' road, I love it.

When we got back the kids jumped on the swings and flew.  This past weekend I realized how I miss our hammock.  I need it.  Darn squirrels, nibble, nibble.  Nevermind, I told myself I would write in the positive.

Moving on, we ventured inside when the sweet smell of skunk was wafting through the yard and as we rounded the corner of the laundry room Mason announced, "It smells better in here." We were safe. After taking a few minutes to chip away a layer of dishes and start a load of laundry I settled into some game time.

I told the kids I needed a few minutes to do some dishes and they could play or draw while I do that before we played a game.  While I did dishes they asked me how to spell Daddy.  Here is the little snippet of joy that evolved and now hangs on our wall with green and yellow striped tape.  Notice the hand holding...bliss!

Mason wanted to do puzzles and Ellie wanted to play a game and neither wanted to compromise.  They wanted me and they wanted their way.  Somehow we settled on Mason building puzzles while Ellie and I played The Ladybug Game.  I turned on Pandora and The Vitamin String Quartet reminded me of our "restaurant" we created Sunday evening with newly carved mini-pumpkins and a nod to fall with candlelight, stew, and homemade bread courtesy of Chef Daddy.  (We won't mention the triple digit heat of Monday.  We shall bask in the beckoning of fall.)

As the music played and we played everything slowed...the spinning, the fight for my attention.  I sat in wonder and took moments to think.  I watched and learned.  Mason executed his puzzle building plans, announcing key strategies as he felt appropriate, giving sideways glances at his sister who was making up her own rules for the game we were about to embark on.  "How will you even play that without the cards, Ellie? You won't even know how far to move."

"We will use our brains to know," Ellie replied with confidence. She did not need the rules, she was creating her own.  We began to play. I took her lead and somehow my brain told me how much to move and when it wasn't right, her brain showed me the way.  Mason quietly kept eyeing such play as he built his puzzle.  It must have taken everything he had to not scream at her, for she was not playing by the rules.  Yet somehow, maybe it was the music, it took over and it wasn't long before one of his glances at our game moved up and locked into mine.  That's when it happened.  He got it.  A grin broke his seriousness, not a wink exactly, but it was his way of doing so.  He suddenly knew that she was okay.  It would be okay that she wasn't following "the rules" she was letting her brain be our guide.

Somehow in the letting it play out, we all figured things out and found the right time to leave those games and puzzles and laugh and play one together.  As they set up one of daddy's "favorites" they put all the pieces out without arguing and said, "Daddy would be blue but he's not here."  He was probably okay with that. The land of candy is not where he likes to reside. We played on and Ellie allowed Mason to lead the way this time and he did so with a bit less control.

It is a dance they say...life.  I love the quote, "Life is a dance.  Sometimes you lead. Sometimes you follow."  I don't know who said it, but I love it.  When I begin to spin again, I hope to find my lead and follow them to greatness.

Start somewhere...

So for a while now I have had an abundance of ideas spinning around in my head and a desire to write them, yet somehow when I find the quiet moments in my day to do such things I find myself too tired and/or noodling about reading other blogs and such, that I can't seem to capture the magic and wonder I was thinking. It saddens me a bit to miss those moments and not write them down, yet it is like something I heard once about trying to take a picture, that somehow in that truly magical moment could the picture really capture that feeling of that lump in your throat? When I miss the opportunities to write, I try to hold onto that feeling, relive it in my mind, let it dance and play and stay a while in hopes that even if I can't go back and reread the words I chose to capture it, or gaze at the amateur photo I took, I can call it back to mind again.

We love to buy flowers at the farmer's market.  Ellie insists on putting them in her room.

The past several weeks have been full.  Sometimes overflowing and I just keep taking it in.  We have had some big moments and many little ones that feel just as big.  There have been laughs and tears and missing teeth everything in between.  

I keep reminding myself to observe and observe and try to let things play out before stepping in, and man these two kids of mine have become the best of buds. They are figuring each other out and I think one of my favorite things lately is walking behind them, or hearing them play through the house, or ride in the back seat.  I love when they carry on as though I am not there, allowing me to catch a glimpse of the bond they have. The other day in the car, this annoying song they love was requested and played on and on, and the more it annoys me, the more I love what comes from it all.  It is like at school when kids request one of my least favorites and I play it and end up having such fun watching the joy it brings.  On this particular car ride the song is singing away, "why do I have to have a sister?...." and goes on to talk about a sister being a pest.  Ellie and Mason begin to argue about the word pest and Mason tells her she isn't one, and she argues that she is, and he continues to argue that no she isn't, because a pest is someone you don't like at all and "I love you, Ellie."  

We must endure the annoyances, the things we cannot stand, to uncover the beauty, the rich, pure beauty that is there.  We must let go of our worries that feelings could get hurt, and trust our children to work through and prove us wrong.  Model, model, model the good you hope to see, and then sit back and let them find it within themselves.  I write this for me.  Take it if you wish and run with it, but I warn you it is not an easy task.  You must continue to remind yourself especially when you want to jump in and rescue.  Trust them, though, they will have the power and strength to show you they can be all that you want them to be. And best of all, they will show you who you want to be too. 

There have been many leaps we have taken these past weeks.  Mason is in Kindergarten.  I was so nervous about this one.  I worried about what it would be like.  I worried about how he might miss preschool, but I was viewing it through my own lens and not his.  His lens is not blurred, his is crystal clear.  He sees the joy of learning, the magic of school.  He sees it through the lens that has been built in the most magical place we could have found. 

First day of Kindergarten, my boy is all grown up!

Ellie anxiously awaited her time and it is here.  The girl is a preschooler.  The place is her school now. She is ready to shine!

First day of preschool, yep girl is growing up, too!

First ride on our new bikes!

Chasing bubbles, not the first and definitely not the last.

Silly faces and sideways photo

So with school, comes homework and this week we were given the task of talking about menus and shopping lists and creating some of our own.  Mason insisted this happen on day 1 of the weekly packet, so Friday night we were at the store shopping and then home to create his pancakes.  I stepped back and let it happen.  I gathered supplies and took some photos, worked the hot griddle, but the preparing was all on them.  Ellie insists on doing the homework, too.  She must keep up with her brother, there is nothing she can't do. So there was flour to measure.

And they were off and running with their ingredients.  I didn't help other than to gather what they "needed". 

 And eggs to crack.

Oops cracked the egg into the shell container, good thing we bought a dozen.

And in a bit, pancakes to be eaten.  Model, model, model and step back and watch it happen.  Who says a 3 year old and a 5 year old can't crack eggs and make pancakes from scratch?

Mason and Ellie playing last weekend

As I said before, the photo just can't seem to capture the moment like really being there can.  It can try, but even when I crop out the piles of mess, the view is not the same as the feeling you get when you're around them.

The Right Place At the Right Time

Last weekend we were having dinner with friends and they were telling us about their upcoming camping trip and then invited us to join them.  Talk about being in the right place and the right time. We were thinking ahead trying to visualize our calendar and couldn't think of anything already on the agenda, so we jumped at the opportunity.  When we got home that night, I saw that the weekend would end on Josh's birthday, what a way to celebrate!

Josh and Ellie at her Birthday Party!

As we woke up the next morning I told Ellie that we were going to a birthday party and she started crying, "But what about our camping trip?"  Girl was ready to go.  That's the thing about being a kid.  No need for plans, packing, getting ready.  They are ready at the announcement of a camping trip.  

All week, in my brain, I was planning the trip and thinking about what I would bring and how I would be all organized and such.  Then my true self appeared Friday morning and realized all that planning "in my head" had not transformed itself into reality and I was rushing around like a crazy person to hurry up and "get everything ready so we could hurry up and get going and have some family fun".  Ugh!  And so began the beginning of our list of what we would do next time to be more prepared for camping as to not be an utter freak-a-zoid prior to embracing the memorable moments we were preparing for. 

Books, directions, CHECK!

After the final trip of running back in to get one more thing and Mason saying, "Can't we just get going and stop having "one more thing" we should just be going by now!?!" He was right, and off we went. We did make one important stop around the corner for a special delivery to our friends. 

Josh's first batch of Strawberry Jam goodness!

Homemade Hummus and Strawberry Jam, CHEERS!

And then we were off...well, after stopping for gas and searching for Tiny Robot who had been dropped into the depths by Mason's seat. Our road trip mix had us dancing in our seats and we were on our way.  As we arrived at the campsite we were greeted by our friends and the fun began.  Josh and the kids started putting the borrowed metal detector to good use searching for buried treasure.  

Shovel to dig up found treasure?  Put it on the list.

After setting up the tents and such, we were off to check out the beach and the dunes.

Happy Campers!

The kids dug right in.

Casey found a crab skeleton

Josh and I had a good laugh at this photo.
When I rotated it so Mason was standing up Ellie looks like she is leaning.
What the heck is going on here?

Running/squealing with glee to and from the waves.

Climbing the dunes as the fog was rolling in

Erik scootin' down the dune

Mason takes a turn

Ellie too

We decided to head into town to find a restaurant for dinner that night as the fog got thicker at the shore. 

The kids rolled down the hill to the parking lot

As a kid there is no worry of getting too sandy. Instead they think: Why wouldn't you roll down the hill?  It takes a lot longer, but it is way more fun.


After dinner we called it a night as our firewood was too thick to get a good fire going and we were all pretty tired out. 


Hatchet for chopping wood?  Put it on the list.

The next morning would bring more fun. The chill in the air felt good and was accompanied by Josh's trip to the local store for a hatchet and then he made a nice fire that was roaring as we rolled out of the tent.

Erik was still loving the glow of his bracelets from the night before.

Ellie was helping me make my list

Friday morning before we left our house for this trip Ellie put her swimsuit on and was ready to hit the beach. She could not be persuaded to change out of it and she renamed herself "Beach Girl".  Don't be fooled by her fully clothed self from Friday photos.  That suit was on underneath. The chill in the air didn't stop her either, that's what robes and puppet gloves are for. 

After breakfast, we packed up for a day at the beach. 

Beach Girl gives the day a thumbs up!

So, off we go!

Taking a quick break

Ready for more

We set up our area and the kids dug right in again. Pedar was helping search for sand crabs and Ellie was instantly mesmerized.

Sand crab homes

Hunting for beach treasure

There is something special about feeling the sand between your toes.

The water was quite cold, but that didn't stop us.

 As the day went on we spoke of childhood family memories we had and embraced the ones that were presently in the making. I remember my family trips to my grandparents beach house in Lincoln City. Beach combing with my dad, collecting rocks and shells.  The ocean was always so magical to me.  The power of the waves, the sand, the search for what you might find. 


A woman I admire deeply told us to find things we love to do and do them in front of kids. To me this is how you teach your kids how to embrace life and truly live it to the fullest.  I thought of how my parents did this for me. My dad was always challenging us to taste new foods and body surf in the waves in Hawaii.  My mom showing me how to care about others and both of them embracing the importance of family and spending quality time. This was in abundance this weekend. 

Dads were building their friendship and playing like kids.

"Always keep your eye on the ocean."

There is something about those waves that just makes you smile.

 The night before our trip we headed to Target for last minute supplies and new sleeping bags. Mason and Ellie found some must have "surf boards", a.k.a. little kick boards. I never got a photo of Josh helping Mason "surf", but it will be burned in my memory for sure. It would have looked similar to these with a tiny batman board under his feet. They even got a round of applause from the skimboarder who was hanging in the sand with his girlfriend.

I love these two boys!

Ellie and Casey worked for hours together digging, caring for sand crabs, and becoming best buds.

One of their big ones, so proud!

Sand castles were plentiful

Countless trips to and from the water. 

"Do things you love in front of kids..."  The kids watched carefully as the dads dug tunnels and such, and were silently challenged to push their designs to the next level.

 We reached the time of day where you are so covered in sand that not being sandy seems odd. You began to embrace the beach spa treatment. You start to dig and love it so much you just can't imagine not being sandy.  In fact each time I pick up a bag I am reminded as tiny grains of sand spill out onto me. That day I discovered how each section of that beach had such variety of sands.  No wonder you could dig there all day and never get tired of it.

Erik taking a break for our picnic lunch

Ahhhhhhhhh

Digging more holes.

Definitely not afraid of getting TOO SANDY.

Tunneling

If all kids could dig in the sand like this...

 Mamas embraced some snuggle time and showed the importance of letting go and time-warping away the day. Reading and letting your imagination take you away from the worries of the work week. 

 Or imagining you are Beach Girl who surfs the big waves. 

"Ellie are you cold?" I asked.
"No, I am a surfer. Surfers never get cold!" she chattered through her blue lips.

A bit of salty sand in her mouth after that last wave.

Daddies were digging for treasures.  Josh was in search of the perfect sand dollar and after several attempts and a big splash...

He found one!

My HERO!

Pedar came running over to Nora at our picnic with a huge grin and genuine excitement to share his new discoveries/theories about the sand crabs.  You could see as he shared and smiled that he was talking to his best friend. 

Moments later, Casey came running up the sand to share a baby sand crab with Ellie.  ("Find things you love to do and do them in front of kids...")

There is no question that these two are in love.  

Time warp we did...we spent the day at the beach and it was glorious.  The sky was grey and the fog was rolling in, but glorious it was indeed.


Back at our camp after a shower and new swimsuit, Beach Girl and Beach Boys hung out at the fire...

Root beers all around!

CHEERS! GAMBAY!

Roasting some dogs

Shower + Glass of Wine = Happy Parents

Jiffy Pop! We must be camping.

After a hard day's work they couldn't eat it fast enough.

The mist rolling in didn't stop us from s'mores.

We love that Auntie Nora!

 The next morning we woke up to wish Josh a Happy Birthday!  Songs were sung and Mason was thrilled to finally dig his surprise card out of his suitcase and surprise Daddy with his tape measure and handwritten card.  Adorable!

Getting a little crazy with our morning coffee.

 Coffee spoon and Tea Kettle?  Put them on the list. 

I love this tent

 We left the campsite, but the adventure continued in Petaluma or as Ellie called it Luma.

Checking out the snails and pondering whether or not they are eating that tree.

Stopping and the luxurious Baker Creek Seed Bank for Daddy's Birthday!

And lunch, Cheers!

Jen and Nora stopped off at The Red Umbrella to do a bit of consignment shop shopping!  Here's Nora sportin' her sassy new shoes.  I know, I am not a photographer, but believe me they were hot.

Some of my new clothes

Heading home..."Uma, has it!"

Car entertainment..."Mommy look, I am playing my bow."

Ellie crashed out and I was sportin' my new shirt!

I am grateful for Nora and Pedar and their sense of adventure.  I thought of how it is easy to fill your days with family time at home, but a weekend getaway now and then is SO invigorating too. I love that they reminded me that there is nature all around us to explore and therefore nearby excursions are a must in our future. 

If you have hung in there to the end of this post you must be feeling the family time love.  Go out and make some memories, dig in the sand, share with your friends, pop some Jiffy Pop, lose yourself in the joy of getting TOO SANDY.